Failure

Over the past few months and years of my life I've come to a realization. I've begun to realize the terrifying elements of failure. The disappoinments, the frustrations, the lack of self confidence, the embarrassment - everything that comes with failing at something. However, one quote comes to my mind everytime I get afraid of failing and it's simply, "You won't fail until you fail to try." If that is not a true statement I don't know what is.... we are failing ourselves each and every time we don't try something new or something scary.

I'm the type of person that is not really excited about surprises or having something thrown at me. The only reason I can come up with as to why I have this issue is the fact that I had a very unstable childhood and surprises were never something I looked forward to- most of the time they meant something bad. My mind has been trained to think that surprises are a bad thing, not a good thing, so I'm unwilling to attempt new things in life. However, over the past few months I've begun to understand how drastically important it is for me to be okay with change, for me to be okay with surprises, and to be okay with the unknown.

I've even found in my Bible reading in Matthew 6 that God tells us not to worry about tomorrow for tomorrow has enough problems of it's own. Live in day tight compartments, for you are only guaranteed today.

So what does all of this have to do with failure? Well, failure is not trying something new, failure is being afraid of the unknown and failure is not enjoying life's little "surprises" that come along the way. Because no matter what change or what problem or what issues arise, there is something to be gained and learned from it. For me, I need to be willing to try to learn new areas in my career - because I won't know if I like them until I've had a taste of what they are. I need to start doing the things I've always been afraid to do because I won't know if they are bad or good until I try them. I need to fight for the people and relationships that are important in my life, because I may never have the opportunity to have them again. People come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. And personally, I'd like to keep all of them around for at least a lifetime, if not eternity.

Well, this random post is super exciting, I know - but I just came to the realization today that I was not trying hard enough - that I was hiding too much behind the protection and barriers that I have built for myself - but I need to branch out and reach out beyond the barriers that are keeping me from my full potential in life. Because there is a much bigger, much more profitable, and much more exciting and challenging world beyond the walls I've built. So this next year, I'm working on making sure to make the best of every moment I have and placing the fear of failure behind me. Carpe Diem - as they say :-)