Season of Singleness

After a night of conversation with some dear girlfriends of mine and hearing their broken hearts open up about the loves they've lost, I couldn't help but writing...

Relationship comes. We open ourselves up and show the inner working of our souls to another... Then the words come...

I
don't
think
We
Should
be together
anymore.

So we return to life, but this time void, lonely, hurt, confused...

We're broken
In the deepest
Most painful
Gut wrenching way

And we're so incredibly alone... It seems the world round us has found love, has found the one - and we sit back and wonder, 'but wasn't he supposed to be mine?'

So the what if's and the why's begin. The realization that our protection, our comfort, our other half is gone is truly unbearable. No more 1st hello's and last 'good nights'. No more silly jokes and sweet glances. No more conversation or growth.

Only death.
Death of a story
Death of a friendship
Death of the hopes
Death of the dreams
Death of relationship.

And the question remains... What happened? What about our hopes, our dreams, our futures together - what about our plans?

We process:
I miss his laugh.
I miss his prayers
I miss our conversations
I miss his safety and comfort
I miss our jokes and stories
I miss his strength and determination
I miss his touch
I just miss him.

Broken relationships. Broken promises. Broken hearts. And it sucks.

In the brokenness comes the attacks from the evil one: you're replaceable. You're not enough. You're unloveable. You're not pretty/skinny/fun/happy/whatever enough. You're a mistake. It's all your fault.

But it's a two way street and one may choose to love while the other doesn't. Either way we're left with an emptiness inside - a void that longs for the companionship, for a best friend, for someone to share in the joys and pains of life together. Our desire is for our husband.

And in the midst of the pain, the suffering, the rain - we see just how desperately our saviors heart breaks for us, his children, to long for him as we long for one another. Jesus, however gives us water that never leaves us thirsty. He quenches our soul and fills the void of our hearts. It's him who restores the brokenness - and gives us peace, faith, and love as we heal from the loss of love unrequited.

So in the season of singleness - yes we must heal - but we also must grow. Grow in our relationship with God. Grow in our friendships with others. Grow in our knowledge of truth. Pray for our future relationship, for our husbands. Encouraging others. Loving the unloveable. Finding God's purpose for our life here on earth. And going after it.

For before we know it... our love may come.