Let Me Trust

Let me not doubt, but Trust
Let me not mourn, but rejoice in your promises
Let me not toil in vain, but see the work of your Hand
Let me not.... falter.

"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but the it is the Lord's purpose that prevails." - Prov. 19:21

It's funny to me that in life so often when it rains - it pours. At least for me, it's not just one struggle at a time, it's a multitude - all hitting the fan at the same time. This week has been one of those weeks where I've questioned the Lord greatly on why I'm at the point in life that I am. Confused, frustrated, downtrodden, and broken I come before His throne for guidance, support, and grace.

This week I found out that my grandfather had a stroke. He's in the end stages of Alzheimer's already, and the stroke is just another part burden for his body to bear. I went to see him this weekend and the Lord reminded me that our life is like the morning fog, here for a moment and then it's gone.

Friday night and into Saturday morning was spent with my grandmother at her house in Mt. Vernon. She too is struggling physically, and all night long I was in the Word and in prayer for my family during this time. Trying to understand why so much was happening all at once in my life. And God spoke to my heart and told me, "my dear daughter, the reason you are struggling so much right now is so that you may be here with your family as they go through this time. That you may focus your time on your family that will inevitably be gone before you know it."

Talk about perspective! I immediately started reading Ecclesiastes, and how Solomon looked back on his life and saw that everything is meaningless - like chasing after the wind. What Solomon really is saying throughout this book is that we should enjoy life, enjoy friendship, and enjoy the blessings we do have - for they are here for but a moment and then they are gone again.

Which brought me back to my own life again. I realized that there is a reason for my life. There is a plan for my life. There is something God has me here for. A job He has for me to do. And whatever that calling may be, I need to be willing - sacrificially willing - to let His will and His plan take place in my life.

As it says in Isaiah 6:8 "Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?' And I said, 'Here am I. Send me!'". Lord- I don't know what you have for me, I feel more confused than knowledgeable at this point in my life, but use me as you will to touch lives, to change lives. That I may love the unloveable. That I may speak up for those who cannot speak up for themselves. That I may see Your will and Your plan - and act it out according to your purposes.

God is faithful and loving. He cares for us so greatly - celebrating with us and mourning with us - feeling every raw emotion that we experience. He places people in our lives for reasons, and one such person has been laid on my heart for months - and I was finally able to sit down and meet with her over coffee. This is a woman of faith that I have looked up to since I've met her and her daughters. She is in love with Jesus, her husband, and her family - and I've officially found myself a mentor. Praise God for answered prayers! Even in the hours we were together chatting about life, I left energized, encouraged, and amazed that the Lord brought two women - 20 years apart in age - that have lived such similar lives and have endured many of the same hardships and pain. God is so good because when we need it the most, He places someone in our path to walk us through and give us guidance, wisdom and perspective. Even before I met this gal for coffee, the Lord confirmed to me "Trust me my child, I have a plan - listen to the advice of this woman I have placed in your life". I LOVE how the Lord works. He is remarkable and beyond description or comparison. Faithful, just, graceful, merciful, and all together loving.

A few words of encouragement for you.... and remember - with God all things are possible - and He is working for your good - with plans for your hope and your future.

"For I am the Lord your God, who takes hold of your right hand, and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." - Is. 41:13

"The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. he will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with his love, he will rejoice over you with singing." - Zeph. 3:17